I didn't think about that, but you are right, at least some. I guess I wonder if it's normal to think and almost plan it all out.

I guess my main problem is that... nothing changes, no matter how hard I try it's like it just loops back around again. Maybe I need to do something big, maybe not. I don't know...

maybe my vision of what would happen is all screwy, I don't know. Maybe that's my real problem, I just don't know so much and it bugs me a lot. I don't know. I'm confused and scared, and lost.

Everything that I enjoy, well, I lose intrest after awhile and I'm looking for more things to enjoy, but I'm running out of things I guess.

I'm not planning to kill myself, but like, sometimes I wonder if I will... I don't know. I don't know a lot...