You haven't met the Prosperity Preachers. el Bunko had one as his "spiritual advisor" during el Bunko I, some blond telegenic thing (as anyone would have guessed).
The scene, la Presidenta goes tits up and reaches the Pearly Gates:
St. Pete: Who the Hell are you?
la Presidenta: But you know me!! I'm the Baby Christian, or whatever that gormless preacher creature called me. Surely he told you I was coming?
St. Pete: Hang on a minute.
St. Pete ducks behind the Gates, pulls out iPhone, and dials God.
God (Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, Goodbye!): God here, what can I do you for?
St. Pete: Guy here says he's the Baby Christian. Know'im?
God: Errrr....no, can't say as I do.
St. Pete: I thought you knew everything, Einstein.
God: Well, some things are better left unknown lest they disturb one’s savoir faire. Give Beelz a ringy-dingy, maybe he knows him.
St. Pete dials Beelzebub.
Beelzebub....(I want some hot stuff baby this evening, hot stuff baby tonight...). Beelz here, waddya want?
St. Pete: Hey Beelz, how are they hanging?
Beelz: Like two Balls-O-Fire orbiting in a frenetic two-step to Jerry Lee Lewis. Wanna see?
St. Pete: Wow!! Sure, but maybe later. Say, we got a guy calling himself the Baby Christian, know'im?
Beelz: Oh him, I couldn't figure out where we left him. How'd he get up there?
St. Pete: The usual way.
Beelz: Well, keep him. We don't want his sort down here.
St. Pete: You do know you are running Hell, right?
Beelz: No, damnit, we don't want him, he gives the nuns the collywobbles. They think he'll introduce them to Jeffrey Epstein.
St. Pete: He cannot stay here, we gotta send him somewhere.
Beelz: Send him back!
St. Pete: Can’t! The Earthlings would take it as evidence there is no God.
Beelz: Look it, I gotta run, the nuns just lit up another bong. They strip off when they get loaded.
Jesus strolls by..
St. Pete: Hey Jesus, how’s Mr. and Mrs. Christ?
Jesus: They are doing fine. You look a bit out of sorts, anything I can do?
St. Pete: Well, see that guy out there? Says he’s the Baby Christian. Know’im?
Jesus (swearing under his breath): Uh.hummina hummina hummina.may be..what does he want?
St. Pete: He’s just gone tits up. I gotta stash him somewhere. God says he doesn’t know him.
Jesus: Likely story from Einstein. Errrrrmmm..How about Purgatory?
St. Pete: I thought that was full of Christians, you got room for one more?
Jesus: We will find a seat next to the toilets.
Jesus walks out to the Baby Christian.
Jesus: Follow me, Baby. I’ll take you to your final destination.. and lose the bags.
la Presidenta: But, but, but, I need all this, they are my security blankies.
Jesus: Okay, take them with you. You'll enter Heaven when you pass your dementia test.
la Presidenta: Hot damn! I’m good at those! Let's go!!
Jesus leads him off, deposits him, and comes back.
St. Pete: What's his test?
Jesus: He has to give all the loot he brought with him to the poor.
St. Pete: Bwahhahahaha.....You are a cruel man, Jesus. Well, I guess we won't be seeing him for a while.
Jesus: Ya, I've made a reservation for him in the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.* 5 bucks says he's late.
St. Pete: I'm not betting you. You rooked me on Billy Graham. Has he found a way to love his fellow man yet?
Jesus: Not exactly. He's still working on L of LGBTQ.
*Thanks Douglas Adams