Journal btlzu2's Journal: Some Christmas wishes from me...to you 12
Now that it's that time of year again, with Christmas only 9 months away, I thought I'd share...my favorite holiday classic. Enjoy.
From Mr. Hankey's Christmas Album.
Mr. Garrison: I heard there is no Christmas
In the silly Middle East
No trees, no snow, no Santa Claus
They have different religious beliefs
They believe in Muhammad
And not in our holiday
And so every December
I go to the Middle East and say:
"Hey there Mr. Muslim
Merry fucking Christmas
Put down that book the Koran
And hear some holiday wishes.
In case you haven't noticed
It's Jesus's birthday.
So get off your heathen Muslim ass
and fucking celebrate."
There is no holiday season in India I've heard
They don't hang up their stockings
And that is just absurd!
They've never read a Christmas story.
They don't know what Rudolph is about
And that is why in December
I'll go to India and shout:
"Hey there Mr. Hinduist
Merry fucking Christmas
Drink eggnog and eat some beef
And pass it to the masses!
In case you haven't noticed
It's Jesus's birthday
So get off your heathen Hindu ass
and fucking celebrate!"
Now I heard that in Japan
Everyone just lives in sin
They pray to several gods
And put needles in their skin.
On December 25th
All they do is eat a cake
And that is why I go to Japan
And walk around and say:
"Hey there Mr. Shintoist
Merry fucking Christmas
God is gonna to kick your ass
You infidelic pagan scum.
In case you haven't noticed
There's festive things to do
So lets all rejoice for Jesus
And Merry fucking Christmas to you."
On Christmas day I travel `round the world and say,
Taoists, Krishnas, Buddhists, and all you atheists too,
Merry Fucking Christmas, To You!
(Clapping)
Thank you Mr. hat
Eh (Score:1)
Re:Eh (Score:2)
Re:Eh (Score:1)
It figures (Score:1)
Re:It figures (Score:2)
shit! (Score:2)
9 months? rob!!! couldn't you have posted this reminder a month ago???
okay, i need to get out there and beat the rush... oh its going to be chaos at the malls (mostly because i'll be stabbing random people... and using the last of my fine concussion grenades).
alright... i'm off!
*grumble* hope rob can bail me out of jail today *grumble*
Re:shit! (Score:2)
No, dear, sir, YOU should have remembered to buy for your loved ones, not me. If you run out of time in this short 9 months, don't come cryin' to me.
Re:shit! (Score:2)
Um, not cool. I assume this is now a troll's account.
It's Christmas Time... IN HELL (Score:2)
Maybe we should have ourselves
a little christmas, right here..
C'mon everybody, gather 'round!
String up the lights and light up the trees
We're gonna make some revelry..
Spirits are high, so I can tell
It's Christmas time in hell!
Demons are nicer as you pass them by
There's lots of demon toys to buy
The snow is falling, and all is well
It's Christmas time in hell!
There goes Jeffrey Dahmer
With a festive Christmas ham..
After he has sex with it
He'll eat up all he can..
And there goes John F
Re:It's Christmas Time... IN HELL (Score:2)
sweet! (Score:2)