Journal Trolling4Dollars's Journal: America in the Grips of Mental Disorder! 12

I'm making this JE, inpired by this one.

America is having it's social and political discourse paralyzed by a newly undiscovered mental disorder. This is believed to be a communicable mental disorder and possibly may have made appearances throughout history. However, through the modern marvels of the Internet and global media (controlled and alternative) it appears to be spreading rapidly.

The first recorded instance of this mental problem was in January 2002 when John Ascroft ordered the lady justice have her breast covered up. According to some people this was done because the Republicans were sick of having their picture taken with the statue in the background whilst speaking out against "immorality". It is my belief that Asscrack is the original vector for this mind infection.

A more recent episode of this disease was the very BIG DEAL made out of a really insignifcant incident: Janet Jackson's Breast. This story dominated media worldwide, but why? I can only connect Ashhole's mental affliction with the big media frenzy over a little bit of skin. GASP! Female skin at that!

And now we have the incident mentioned in tuxette's JE today. (Go read the article linked in it. It's worth it to see how incredibly sick we've become as a country.)

Fellow /.-ians! Let's put a name to the face of this disorder: Mammophobia. This disorder is getting in the way of our society's ability to see real issues and discuss real problems. It is also being manipulated by people in the media and our administration to get the public in a frenzy over nothing. (Much Ado...) Apparently Ashcroft and people like him who are afflicted with this disorder are running around terrified of the image of a woman's breast. Why? I can only attribute this phobia to latent homosexual tendencies in men (Hey this is /. what would a rant be without an attack on someone's sexuality! ;) ) or jealousy in women. Why jealousy in women? Perhaps it has something to do with the people of the United States being VERY INTERESTED in breasts. So I posit that in order to become infected with Mammophobia, you must also be infected with an d intense case of Mammophilia.

If you think about it, most US-ians have severe mammophilia. Women are getting implants left and right regardless of possible health issue. Men have gigabytes of imagery in print, analog and digital formats mostly focused on breasts much of it held in secrecy from their mates. Why? Why are Americans so hung up on breasts? Maybe it's because, most Americans judge the value of women on their breasts?

Yes, it's a very unfair and stupid metric to gauge a female by, but that's where a teenaged mindset is. What's that, you say? "Teenaged mindset"? My final bit of thought for you: If you REALLY think about it, the United States is really a teenager going through a rebellious awkward stage. This is a key point in it's development. Like any teen, you want to watch out who the teen keeps company with. Right now, the teenaged US has fallen in with a bad crowd. Much like a human teen, this is when you really have to make sure that the subject makes it through unscathed. This teen could wind up doing something really stupid and self destructive (like underaged drinking and driving with those bad friends mentioned above), all the while thinking itself invincible. This teen could also get really depressed with it's "lot in life" and do seomthing even worse after coming to the conclusion that everything is hopeless. Either way, you wind up with a dead or severly disabled teen. Or... this teen could make it through to a productive young adulthood and become a good addition to the global family. Let's work and hope for the latter.