Journal TechnoLust's Journal: Feeling used... 7

William was being loud and I told him that he could stay for a minute, but then he'd have to go. LeAnne and I were trying to have a private conversation and he walked up to us and started trying to talk about politics. I said, "I don't mean to be rude, but we're trying to have a private conversation, which is why we left everyone else and came in here. Can we finish our conversation and then come talk to you?" He said, "Oh, that's straight, dog. That's why everyone likes me around when they're drinking, I'm cool like that." But he didn't leave. He kept chiming in. LeAnne is too nice to say anything, and I'd already asked him to leave. So I just looked at him and shook my head and walked off. LeAnne walked off and went to find Chris.

Later I was in my bedroom with the door closed talking to Mel and Deborah. William just opened the door and walked in and asked if he could make himself another drink. First of all, it pissed me off that he just opened my door and walked in my room. So I said, "Why are there people just coming into my room? If people don't stop just walking in here without knocking, I'm going to fucking go off on someone!" Then he asked if he could have another drink and I told him no, because I only had one mixer left and I was going to drink it as soon as I finished mine. He said he was going to leave. Uhh... bye!

Then I asked Mel to leave my room for a minute because I wanted to talk to Deborah alone. She said, "Oh, I guess you are going to do a shot without me, aren't you?" I went off. I said, "I've never left you out, and even if I wanted to, IT'S MY FUCKING LIQUOR! Be glad I gave you what I've given you so far and if you're lucky, I'll pour you another later when I'm done talking to her." Deborah was upset because of some things that had happened at work, so we did a shot and then we talked about it, and then we kissed and I held her for a minute and told her it was going to be ok.

I'm a generous person, but when people start showing up expecting me to have liquor and beer and let them come play ping pong and drink for free, fuck them. And when someone like Mel bitches because she thinks someone else is getting more than her, or she's being left out, piss off, now you get nothing. Ingrate.

So LeAnne and I finally got to finish our conversation. We went outside and sat on the tailgate of my truck and looked at the stars and finished talking. We've been such good friends and we can talk about anything. She was worried about all the girls that have been hanging around me lately. She said none of them are good enough for me and she's worried I'm going to let them take advantage of me or that a better girl would think I'm seeing one of them. I told her that I wasn't worried about it because I'm moving to Cincy (if Josh with ever get his company on the ball before I have to start stripping for money) and these girls will be long gone.

After that conversation, I went to bed and put my iPod on. The last song that played was Enya - Only Time (thanks Koria). I thought that was a good song to end the night on.