I'm in Canada, actually.

Your reply explains a great deal.

In my niche, we have a joke: "Criminal lawyers treat each other civilly, but the way civil lawyers treat each other is criminal."

It's a joke, but it contains a kernel of truth. I think the problem relates to the objectives. In civil law, they squabble over money. The larger the sums of money involved, the more petty the squabbling can be. But we're talking about humanity here. There are always exceptions.

Why do lawyers have such huge egos? Necessity. It's a reflection of their clients' needs. Litigation is a high-stakes contest in which the other side will seek to capitalize on your weaknesses. To survive emotionally, one must have great confidence in one's cause, and one's ability to present it. The client needs someone with massive self-confidence.

Why do lawyers behave like jerks to their staff? Insecurity is one. The constant fear of failure just makes it worse. And it's a terrible shame. Being rude to your staff adds to your risk of failure. I find that happy staff go the extra mile for me. When the stakes are high, that matters.

If your wife worked as a legal temp, then she naturally wound up at the places that couldn't keep their staff. The ones where the lawyers were jerks. If she worked in the biggest towers downtown, then she worked where the competition between lawyers is most fierce, where the egos and the insecurity play the worst mischief. I feel for her.

I successfully avoided that rat-race. I started prosecuting in a remote northern town ("I'm just a simple country lawyer..."). My role is also a bit different. We have another saying here: "The Crown never wins nor loses." If the evidence doesn't prove the guilt of the accused, then the prosecutor is not to blame. So my stress levels are different.

If she needed to work with lawyers again, she should find a small office where the staff don't change much. After the lawyers interview her, she should interview the staff. Privately. Some law firms are families that stick together through good times and bad. My father's staff were like that. They really loved him.