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Journal Ethelred Unraed's Journal: Random acts of Ethelredism 43

Journal by Ethelred Unraed

I finally got fed up with how my Dual G5 would slow to a swap-thrashin' crawl whenever I was doing some design work (OK, so I like to have Photoshop, iTunes, Illustrator, Freehand, InDesign and my 6 GB-laden Mail.app open simultaneously). So I ordered a couple 1 GB sticks of RAM, and a 250 GB SATA drive while I was at it (hey, it was cheap).

So I open up the case, figuring this should be a cinch, having put in RAM and HDs many times before. But instead of the usual drive sled, there's...nothing. No obvious way to attach the drive to the frame, though I did find the SATA cables tucked neatly under the drive bay. Grumbling, I went and dug out the G5's manual (which I miraculously found without too much spelunking). Turns out it has some screws handily provided inside the frame, which you screw into the side of the drive and slide it into the provided grooves -- a nifty trick, but I was annoyed that I actually had to open a manual, which would wound my male ego, if it wasn't for the fact that it's completely invincible and clubs seals for foreplay.

Meanwhile, I also put in the sticks of RAM in two open slots and close up the case, fire 'er up and expect to see 3 GB RAM under "About This Mac...". Nope. Just one. Huh? OK, I know that G5s have to have RAM installed in pairs (just like some older Macs did)...and in the old days the pairs were side-by-side, which would make sense. I open up the case, and yeah, the sticks are installed side-by-side, or seem to be. I take out the sticks and make sure they're installed correctly, close the case, reboot and still just 1 GB. Grumbling, I go back to the manual...and it turns out they have to be installed symmetrically, i.e. inwards-outwards. IOW I expected:

1 1 2 2 3 3 4 4

but it's really

4 3 2 1 1 2 3 4

What-the-dubya-tea-eff? So much for Macs being intuitive.

Then when I was closing the case and putting it back upright, I forgot that I still had the Bluetooth USB dongle sticking out, it got caught in something else and snapped. *sigh*

Ah well, at least I now have my 3 GB (64-bit! Woo-hoo!), and I do notice the compy is much compier. Uh, faster. Particularly when Photoshop is running (Photoshop is such a memory dog it's amazing, though OS X itself is no slouch). And I have lots more space for my pr0n^WMP3s^Wproject work.

Meanwhile, BoE and the kiddos are off at the outlaws for the weekend (BoE being badly in need of some well-earned R&R, not that she seriously expects to get much at her parents'), while I sit here playing bachelor. Thus it's time for a POLL:

How should Ethelred spend the weekend?
A) Fly to Canada and stalk Sarah McLachlan, then boink her senseless when she succumbs to my charms
2) Go to the local brewery for a swim
©) Hijack a steamroller, then flatten all dachshunds in Hannover
Ø) Fly to Iraq and sort out all that business down there with a wave of my imperial hand (then watch it get blown off)
€) Command El Smooch's presence and go out for a serious bout of binge drinking (drinkist, of course), while we storm local pizzerias and do random violence to anyone caught eating pineapple pizza
0b110) Seize infinite power in a glorious cunning coup d'etat, then celebrate by giving Barbara Bush a spanking

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Random acts of Ethelredism

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  • A) Fly to Canada and stalk Sarah McLachlan, then boink her senseless when she succumbs to my charms

    Shouldn't that be "Fly to Canada and stalk Sarah McLachlan, then boink her senseless so that she succumbs to my charms

    • That was the beta version.

      Cheers,

      Ethelred

    • 1) Cut out her vocal cords (or something; I'm not picky about methods, just results) so she never, ever inflicts another record on her less-than-grateful homegrown audience; and

      }) Visit me, if you're that close already. *grin* We can get some Vietnamese food and I can corrupt your mind with Canadian punk and Evil Israeli Disco, you know, like real music...

      Oh, I'm going to hell now...
      • can corrupt your mind with Canadian punk and Evil Israeli Disco

        You mean like Rush? I love Rush!

        Cheers,

        Ethelred

        • That goes beyond willful obtuseness into...I don't know what.

          Then again, someone from the DOJ surfed to my website from my comment "Boink!" downthread, about decontaminating the airwaves from the noxious chanteuses, so there's no accounting for anything these days. Uh, guys? Lighten up!

          The things one learns from one's stats tracker...
          • Then again, someone from the DOJ surfed to my website from my comment "Boink!" downthread, about decontaminating the airwaves from the noxious chanteuses, so there's no accounting for anything these days.

            Whoa. The DOJ reads my journal! I r0xxor5!!!11!!!!1!!!!!

            The things one learns from one's stats tracker...

            Yeah, like some dickhead with a Mac running Safari in Germany was on your site, too. I'll go kick his ass, if you want.

            [chorus of voices erupts "PLEASE DO!"]

            BTW I own two Sarah McLachlan CDs

            • Yeah, like some dickhead with a Mac running Safari in Germany was on your site, too.

              Yeah, I was wondering if that particular dickhead with a Mac running Safari in Germany was a certain Mac-using dickhead in specific.

              I'll go kick his ass, if you want.

              You can if you like, as long as I get to watch. Inhuman feats of flexibility always amuse me, especially since I'm about as flexible as rebar.

              BTW I own two Sarah McLachlan CDs. Does that make me a bad person? ;-)

              No, it means two things -- you don't
  • Boink Ms. McLachlan, of course. She's so skronkable. But you might not want to mention the seal clubbing, she probably wouldn't like that very much.

    We'll want detailed reports and pictures, of course.
  • is ethelredism a religion, a political system, or both?

  • Dominator2010, dubiousdave, and I are hitting The Ginger Man in Austin tomorrow evening. Why not drop by and join us?
  • 0b110) Seize infinite power in a glorious cunning coup d'etat, then celebrate by giving Barbara Bush a spanking

    Bonus points for getting Jenna, too.

    Bush twins are teh hawt.

    Unless you were talking about the twin's Grandma... eew.

    • Re:Babs (Score:2)

      by nizo ( 81281 ) *
      Unless you were talking about the twin's Grandma...


      Thanks for that wonderful visual. Now I need soap for my brain.

  • Don't forget the goggles.

    As for you being dumbfounded by the inner worky-bits of the Mac, its because you come from a dumb place. Have you done no VLSI?! Symmetricity is the height of intelligent design! this "11223344" crap is for stupid windows users. Mac ram is like a butteryfly; it causes hurricanes in japan (and typhoons, too).
  • Doesn't do it for me. Jody Wately [thabiz.com]. There is a fine woman, who can sing. But some weirdo did this [lycos.nl]...
  • ...while we storm local pizzerias and do random violence to anyone caught eating pineapple pizza

    You see, it's these little nit-picky obsessions that tend to bring great empires down. Do you really want to see your best laid plans torn asunder because you caught me enjoying a pie Hawaiian-style, as I prefer?

    In other words, bring gloves, 'cause we're gonna drop 'em, Kraut-boy!

  • You send BoE to the in-laws for some R&R with the kids?!

    If that's the treat she gets, I hate to think what she gets when she's been bad.

    • I hate to think what she gets when she's been bad.

      Even if I can't reply to an Ethelred journal with lines from 'The Germans [fawltysite.net]', I can find something Python:

      "Wicked wicked [BOE] ... she is a bad person and she must pay the penalty. And here in [Ethelredia], we have but one punishment ... you must tie her down on a bed ... and spank her. Come!"
      • Even if I can't reply to an Ethelred journal with lines from 'The Germans'

        Largely because BoE and I have the episode pretty well memorized, thanks to our having Season 1 of Fawlty Towers on DVD.

        You didn't really think I wouldn't have subjected her to that already, did you?

        Cheers,

        Ethelred

        • How did they release Fawlty Towers over there? In the US, every episode (12??) is in a single package. At least when I bought it.

          I've been trying to find some Fawlty Towers scripts for Angie to read (also for Freaks and Geeks. For the latter, I'm afraid I'll have to buy the script book, scan and OCR it) Wonder how it will be with just the scripts instead of seeing it.

          • How did they release Fawlty Towers over there?

            Ah, the joys of being able to order from Amazon.co.uk and the BBC directly. :-)

            This is what we have. [amazon.co.uk]

            This is what we don't have (yet). [amazon.co.uk]

            However, you can now get all of it in one box. [amazon.co.uk]

            FWIW we also have the Black Adder I-IV box set [amazon.co.uk], though unfortunately they later come out with a new box set that [amazon.co.uk] includes the specials (such as the Christmas episode).

            As for reading the scripts vs. seeing it, obviously a lot of the humor is of the visual or aural variety

            • I'd like to get the Black Adder set or the Monty Python set.

              She still visualizes. Nifty little bit about brain biology. Most of the vision stuff is at the back of your head. Typical headaches caused by reading, too much tv, etc. have a locus at the back of the head. When Angie reads (braille) too much, she gets the exact same type of headache. The same parts of her brain are being fired. Weird.

              She was visual until ~30 years old. She'll always visualize, I suspect.
    • The trick is this: The outlaws unburden her of the kids for a few days while she is continually confronted by them, thus making her realize that I am not so bad after all, and when she comes back she is damned happy to see me, and the kids are completely worn out and sleep for a few days solid, and we have familial bliss.

      And heavy petting.

      ...

      Of Cleo-Kitty. Dirty-minded bastard.

      Cheers,

      Ethelred

  • Fly to Canada and stalk Sarah McLachlan, then boink her senseless when she succumbs to my charms.

    I had no idea that she was a seal. Oh, that other type of boinking...

    • If Eth would be so kind as to bash Ms. McLachlan over the head with a club, vast hordes of Canadians (inasmuch as there are vast hordes of Canadians anyhow) would be infinitely happier. While he's at it, he could get rid of Celine Dion, Averil Lavigne, Shania Twain, and Alanis Morrisette, too.

      *sigh* I miss the good old days of the Dayglo Abortions...
  • My vote is for flying to Canada, where not only can you stalk/boink SM, but swim in a random brewery after flattening dachsunds and pineapple-pizza eaters with a steamroller. Though the BB spanking has merits too.
  • The the lyrics of the song "Possession" are taken from the letters written to Sarah McLachlan by a crazed stalker. He tried to sue her for royalties on the song (while he was still in prison for stalking her) and lost.
  • With the work issued G4 laptop. Came with 512M of RAM, but that was way too little. IS handed me a 1G chip to add in. I plugged it in, but it still seemed dog slow. (for the past couple months) On holiday this week and poking about at some of the system properties and it shows up at only having 512M...

    Weird.

    Found a knife and worked off the back plate. The stick could slide in another cm or so. Argh. Eclipse is much better with 1.5G. Classic problem between the chair and keyboard. And I call myself

  • @*0 (Score:2)

    by Degrees ( 220395 ) *
    Fly to Canada, boink Avril Lavigne [nndb.com] with such aptitude that she solves the Iraq mess due to your bidding.

    or just get her to buy you another Mac. [avrillavigne.com]

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