Sorry, but I'm not interested unless [profession] hates him because of it.

The simplest reason would be to avoid carrying more hardware. I love my SP but since it's a unitasker I usually leave it out of my bag. Other potential reasons include, but are not limited to, ROM hacks, developing a deeper understanding of the technology and simply overcoming the challenge of emulating something correctly.

I picture breaking five legs and having it hop around on the sixth like a pogo stick.

You're "effectively locked in" because they offer a better deal? You have no choice but to go for the cheapest option? Sorry, but that's like me saying I'm locked in to buying my groceries at Wal-Mart because they sell them cheaper than the local supermarket. While it may be more expensive we can both shop elsewhere if our morals dictate that the cheaper option is not the better one. If you don't trust Amazon don't give them your money. Then you can chalk the difference in price up to the cost of maintaining your morals.

GB = 1000 megabytes.
GiB = 1024 megabytes.

Basically, GB is how the users and hard drive manufacturers see it and GiB is how the computers (and computer people) see it. So no, they don't mean GB in this case.

No problem, gay people read too.

If you're looking for someone to learn sign language from I'd recommend visiting Conversation Exchange, Verbling or Italki. Since it's a constructed language you can become reasonably proficient in a few weeks. I taught myself to finger spell over an afternoon and could carry on an intermediate level conversation after about two weeks.

My father in law is one of those "too proud" people with regards to his hearing and having him in the house is an exercise in frustration. He doesn't have the radio too loud, when in fact it is nearly impossible to set the volume higher, we're just too sensitive. He doesn't have a hard time hearing us when we're practically yelling in his face, we're just not speaking up. Etc. In his case, however, I think the hardest part of convincing him to communicate with speakers of other languages or learn one himself is his old world belief that non-English speakers are inferior in some way.

The chip and PIN cards come with a randomly generated PIN by default, you can change it at the branch though.

You can dry roast mealworms in your oven and pulverize them in a blender or spice grinder for a cheap protein powder. It adds kind of a nutty flavor to whatever you put it in.

Stealing a base is more like taking your time when your opponent forgots to stop their clock in a game of speed chess. It's not cheating so much as taking advantage of inattentiveness.

As long as no one looked at him they couldn't see him.

Looks like someone couldn't afford the apostrophe tax.

"If you can't decide on your own, then no". Problem solved.

My infrared thermometer has a laser, does that count?

Try catchng them with a net or fishing rod instead. Far less weight to carry.